presence. that’s what we talking about. make her scream and tremble takes skill? (no) a big wang? (no) confidence? (warmer but #getreal) all it takes is presence.
the present moment is what a zen monk would say is a beautiful moment. when you touch deeply reality, all else falls away. all our dreaming (our goals fears desires) evaporates and here we are! and we have all the skill and hugeness and confidence we’d ever need.
mayyyyybe I’m not explaining this very well. being good at sex is like being good at anything, it takes your awareness. to be truly aware during sex you must–if you ate the anxious type– stop worrying about!: if youre big enough going slow enough is she wet enough is she enjoying it oh god is she thinking of someone else is she faking that orgasm what if what if~
or–for the douche type–this chick’s not as hot as the last one; I better hurry up the game starts in 15 minutes and I still gotta make nachos; did I forget my hat at work again? shit! my fohawk is fucking proper unlike this bitches foresty madness she got going on down here blah blah~
both are examples of nonpresence. in either case, the answer is self-sexiness. if you find yourself sexy, sex is fucking hot with everyone, because all your inner illusions and fears are gone, and you experience the present moment, and a most thrilling biologically enhanced present moment: fucking!
I promise it works. (truly though I just write this #bullshit to organize my own thoughts and let it out floodwater to floodzone. so take it or leave it because I love you)
here’s a random example: why do loving parents have more fun doing things with their kids than without them? because!:
a father’s life is about being a good dad. it becomes that when his son is born. when you’re son is happy, swinging and laughing on the swings holding his animal crackers tight, you the father say: shit! look how happy he is! I am a great dad! I did it!
these thoughts are usually quite subtle. they are feelings…deeper than words. but this is what they are. in this moment, all other concerns about life and career and power disappear, because you the male lifeform are truly validated by your son’s laughter, and stop worrying about anything else.
this is presense. this is true happiness without condition. dad’s often act fucking crazy with their happy kid. they will have water balloon fights, dress up like a clown or a turkey and gobble, stay up late reading to him, miss a conference call while watching his son sleep in his pirate ship bed, safe and warm and happy from the dad and cotton candy day he had.
damn! can you feel it? sigh were my words silkier, the essence of sex and love would slide through with more liquidmaroon.
oh well! but maybe you see. look at yourself in the mirror, and watch how all the negative critical thoughts arise. silence them with conviction and belief!
~thus your presence, powerful and clear, comes forth; thus you become a sex god(dess). and Venus herself steps from her waterborn seashell and hunts you down and pins you to the ground, her mouth open and her eyes bright sunset, hungry for the boy they say gives an orgasm no mortal girl can survive. ❤